Monday, October 1, 2018

Emotions Are Wavering


View from the girls' house at Potter's Field Ranch.


Emotions are so wavering, that’s why it’s so important to base our walk by faith, not feelings. As I look back at the beginning of July before IGNITE Class 15 came, I was so nervous and fearful. I was beginning a new role as the head girls’ RA and I knew I wasn’t capable. Sitting on the steps of the girls’ house at the new Potter’s Field Ranch, the Lord gave me Psalm 121:1-2, “I will lift my eyes to the hills – from whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.” In that moment, I looked up at the mountains surrounding the property, a sight that never got old, and God gave me peace. He was with me, He is with me. The past three months were a time of learning, preparation, and growth. It was a sweet season, one that I will cherish for a long time; IGNITE Class 15 has a special place in my heart…
 
IGNITE Class 15 and some Potter's Field staff.
Today, I am in the Kingdom of Cambodia. God’s promises are yes and amen (2 Corinthians 1:20). I have the honor and privilege of overseeing the team that will come in two weeks from IGNITE Class 15, as well as being the Potter’s Field liaison for Cambodia! I’ve been back for almost a week; a rollercoaster of emotions it has been. Emotions are so wavering. I traveled alone and left just before the last week of IGNITE Class 15’s training. I simply miss everyone from Montana and Colorado too. But, Jehovah Shammah, the Lord is there and is my Companion. Despite the sometimes tears, God has taken me back to that day on the steps of the girls’ house before the interns’ training - where does my help come from? My Companion.

 
With Team Cambodia IGNITE Class 15!
He has reminded me of HIS faithfulness of being there, of the army I have in Colorado, Montana, and here in Cambodia behind me and with me, as I am for them. I am reminded that He has brought me back to the land He promised my return (several times in fact), and I still got to be a part of the interns who got baptized the other day and their Commissioning through video calls! Yes, emotions are wavering, but do I stand on those? No way. I stand on my Rock and the One who is there!

“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned. Nor shall the flame scorch you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior…”
-Isaiah 43:2-3 (emphasis added)